I’m glad the portrait of Ben Franklin stayed the same on the new $100 bill. There’s something about his slight, tight frown, the paternal hint of disappointment in his eyes and those pursed, sealed lips that seem to say, “I don’t approve of what you’re doing, but I can’t stop you from rolling this banknote into a straw and ripping a fat rail of white lightning in the Buffalo Wild Wings handicapped bathroom stall, you goddamn beautiful disaster.”
this post is my everything
[falls in the shower] parkour
it’s a metaphor
The best part is that the crab is the symbol for the zodiac sign Cancer, so in a way even the crab itself is a metaphor
The Fault in our (Lob)Stars
i like it when the sky looks like the world is going to end
My dad gave our 2 month old English bulldog puppy a taste of strawberry Popsicle today. This is true happiness.
You know what?
I don’t care if being a lesbian isn’t natural.
Its 2014. Oreos don’t have a single natural ingredient in them that isn’t distilled out of recognition. People get their vegetables from cans. They have made cruelty-free, lab-grown BACON. People fly around in big, metal machines.
I. AM. TALKING. TO SOMEONE. ACROSS THE WORLD. IN A MATTER OF SECONDS.
Not natural. Is not bad.
Your rhetoric is no longer a valid excuse for hate.
maybe i’ll be hot tomorrow
people who don’t text back straight away annoy me even though i am one of those people